


A Friend in Need

by aravenwood



Series: Whumptober 2020 [6]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxious Caleb Widogast, Caleb Widogast Has Issues, Caleb Widogast Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Caleb Widogast Needs a Hug, F/M, Fjord Has Feelings (Critical Role), Whumptober 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:07:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26893432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aravenwood/pseuds/aravenwood
Summary: In the early days of the virus, Caleb finds himself all alone at home and struggling to cope.Set during the early days of the Covid-19 lockdowns.Written for the Whumptober 2020 prompt "isolation".
Relationships: Fjord & Caleb Widogast, Nott | Veth Brenatto & Caleb Widogast, Yeza Brenatto/Nott | Veth Brenatto
Series: Whumptober 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947343
Comments: 4
Kudos: 80
Collections: Whumptober 2020





	A Friend in Need

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is an idea I have had since about May, right after I really got used to lockdown. In the very early days - the first couple of weeks or so - I struggled a lot with my anxiety in a very similar way to how Caleb struggles in this fic. 
> 
> TW for discussions of pandemic-related anxiety.
> 
> Enjoy!

Caleb would happily admit it - he had a panic attack the day a countrywide lockdown was announced. Well, technically he had five panic attacks but they were so merged together that he’d hardly count them as separate.

Nott was halfway across the country at the time, meeting Yeza’s family for the first time. She was probably already nervous as it was, and now it seemed like she was going to be stuck there because there was no way she could get back home in time before the rules came into force. And anyway, it was too dangerous - she’d have to go through airports, sit on coaches with strangers and he wasn’t willing to put her at risk like that.

And so he was home alone. He didn’t mind being alone, not really, but it had been a long time since he’d felt this trapped, this helpless. For the past few days he’d even been too frightened to go food shopping despite the sparseness of the kitchen cupboards. He was hungry and he desperately needed to go out, but the truth was that he was terrified. He’d seen the news; all of the panic buying, all of the fear and the anger. The shops were somehow fuller than ever of customers and emptier and emptier of stock.

He didn’t like shopping on a normal day, never mind now.

But he had to go. There was no one else who could go - everyone else lived across town and he felt physically sick over the idea of asking them to go out for him. He knew that they already saw him as broken and they were so kind to him, but he couldn’t burden them like that. Not now when they had their own things to worry about.

At least they had each other, he thought, and it put him at least a little at ease. Beau, Jester and Fjord had their apartment, and Mollymauk and Yasha had theirs. They were together and they were safe.

But him…he was alone. Trapped in the house with only his own mind and so many news articles all saying the same thing - time to start panicking. If Nott was here then she’d be able to stop him from overthinking and checking every news article he could find. She’d be able to get him away from a fixation on statistics. And she’d be able to put a book in his hands and everything would suddenly be fine because she’d be there to help him through this.

Ever since the news, his phone had been ringing almost non-stop. The only call he’d answered had been one from Nott, asking him frantically if he was alright and insisting that she could come home despite Yeza’s voice in the background encouraging her to stay with him. There were also messages from various group chats, missed calls from Molly and Beau and Jester. Even an email from Essek. But it was all too much, and all he wanted to do was curl up in a corner and cry.

And that’s exactly what he’d done. One-but-really-five panic attacks later he was wedged in the corner behind his front door, clutching Frumpkin to his chest as his breathing finally evened out. He was stiff from the position, aching from the violent tremors which came with his panic attacks and so exhausted that he could sleep right there. Frumpkin nudged his cheek and wriggled, but stilled a moment later as Caleb pressed his face against the tabby cat’s soft fur. The purring was loud and comforting in his ears, lulling him into semi-consciousness.

–

He awoke to a loud, insistent knocking on his front door. With the panic still rushing through his veins, he instinctively curled himself up tighter and hid his face behind his knees. Whoever was at the door he didn’t want to see them, shouldn’t be seeing them because it was dangerous and what if they infected him, what if he got sick and it was serious and he never saw Nott or the others again? He whimpered a little and bit back a full blown sob.

Alone, he was meant to be alone. Isolated. All on his own to deal with this, to keep himself and others safe. This was what he had to do. It was all he could do and if he opened the door then he would be putting everyone at risk and he couldn’t live with that guilt-.

“Caleb? Are you in there?”

He froze midway to panic attack number six - because ok, maybe it was five separate panic attacks. Was that-?

Fjord?

“Caleb, let me know you’re ok in there! Come on, open up!” Fjord called through the door, rattling his fist against the wood. He sounded anxious, his southern accent thicker than normal. 

He never came to visit, not on his own. Which meant…had something happened? What if there was something wrong with Jester or Beau? What if one of them was hurt or sick or-?

Caleb was off the floor and half-sprinting to the front door, his heart racing and his entire body shaking. His legs protested profusely at the fast movement but he shoved down the pain as he fumbled for the door, stiff and numb fingers pawing at the chain for a minute before he finally managed to undo it. 

He pulled open the door.

Fjord stood a few feet back, thick arms crossed over his chest and his brow furrowed in a frown. He had a pair of gloves on as well as a hoodie that looked too big even on his broad shoulders, and he was chewing nervously on his lower lip. “Hey, Caleb,” he drawled. “We’ve been real worried about you.”

“Oh yes um…” Caleb self-consciously crossed his own arms and rocked back and forth on his heels. “I’m sorry, I ah…I have not looked at my phone today.” It was a weak lie - he’d watched his phone every single time a call rung out, waiting for it to stop.

“Right.” Fjord didn’t look convinced. “Listen I…I just wanted to check up on you. And I brought you some um, some food and stuff since I wasn’t sure if you’ll have been out since Nott left - I know you get caught up in your books and forget sometimes.”

Caleb glanced down and found several tote bags on his doorstep, full of bread and tins and anything he himself would have thought of buying. He even spotted a box of cat food and he couldn’t help but smile - even though Fjord was allergic to cats and hated to be around them, he’d still thought about Frumpkin.

“Thank you Fjord, I ah…I haven’t been out, you’re right. That is very…thoughtful of you. I hope that it didn’t put you out,” Caleb said with a watery smile.

“Nahhhhh,” Fjord answered with a shrug. “Actually I was going shopping anyway. And I also um, actually I also wanted to ask you if…well uh, Nott’s still away, right? So you’ll be on your own. I just wanted to ask if…do you want to come and stay with the girls and I?”

He said the last part in such a rush that it took Caleb a moment to figure out what he’d said. When he did, he froze for a good few seconds. “Stay with you?” he echoed. “Isn’t that…dangerous?”

Fjord looked down. “I spoke to Jester and Beau, and I spoke to Nott and she said that you sounded off on the phone. And I figured that, well, this is going to be hard on everyone. But with your, you know…I was worried that it would be even harder on you,” he explained, his voice barely louder than a whisper. 

Caleb smiled weakly and nodded. “It’s…scary,” he admitted.

“Exactly, and I didn’t want you to be afraid. Not if we can help. So uh, what do you say? You can bring Frumpkin and as many books as you want, and I’ve got an old Kindle and I know it’s not the same but it’s something and if that doesn’t work then you can buy books online and get them sent to the apartment…” Fjord drifted off and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

It was…tempting, to say the least, to accept the offer. He valued his time alone, he was an introvert after all. But the idea of being all alone in this…it was terrifying.

“Um…please. That would be…that would be wonderful,” he mumbled.

Fjord grinned. “Awesome! On you go then, go and grab your stuff and I’ll take this shopping to the car. I’m so glad you said yes because Beau told me to buy ice cream and I panicked and put it in yours and if she found out she was gonna…” He shuddered. “Yeah. If you put your stuff on the step, I’ll help you carry it out.”

Caleb nodded. “I will make sure Frumpkin does not pick on you,” he said with a slight smirk. “But you know that you’re his favourite.”

“I noticed. He’s a devil, I tell you.”

“Oh and Fjord?”

Fjord looked up. “Yeah?”

“Thank you. For…for looking out for me.”

“No problem, buddy. We’re in this together, got to look out for the people you love, you know?”

For the first time all day, Caleb could breathe again.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
